Might be out of the dukkhas nanas, I hope.

I recognized that my mind started whirling and identifying with thoughts and emotions on Wednesday evening.

Come Thursday, it was full-blown rumination, a whole sit filled with many dramatic stories, self-talk, and after having formless, pleasant, happy sits, these are a huge disturbance to the mind. whoa.

I decided to take it easy and take my own advice this time, as I was prepared to do a deep dive into sits this week, looking at how the workload at work has scaled back.

Hence I meditated only 4 times a day, just being with the chaotic, painful, suffering, poor mind who is trying to make sense of something new. It is processing stuff and I am sitting to give it time to do its work. I have thoroughly understood this now. So, zero fighting, no blaming self for being not discipline at noting closely — as before this I was noting with almost no gap, it is definitely not about effort.

After a few hot showers, good food, exercise (both cardio and strength), 8 hours of sleep ( increase hours), ample reading time at night which is something I truly love to do, the last meditation on Saturday evening was full of equanimity and mindfulness. My mind has calmed down and quieted down a lot. I am glad.

This cycle into the dukkhas took about 3 whole days from the first sense of something is different. Not too bad really. compare to 3 months in the first path, this is really ok :)

I hope I have not jinxed it, we will see tmr.

2) I have learned from Angelo to frequently drop into presence to feel my current moment through just my senses, e.g the fingers typing and the warmth at the tips of my fingers, pressure on my legs, the coolness of my breath, aircon whirring, yellowy lights, the thoughts about having a snack, and dropping into this pure sense experience is such an enjoyable thing to do and so simple.

I dropped into this several times today. going to try more tomorrow whenever I have a moment! or whenever the mind wants to dredge up nonsense to think. :)

That’s all for today, I am off to read a bit and get adequate sleep.

Metta, yinling.